Swifty phiphty niner

1. Less Anger, More Understanding When we can understand why the other person acts the way they do—whether they are three years old or thirty—the need to yell automatically starts to diminish. 2. Less Complaining, More Gratitude When we look at all the wonderful things in life, the things that don’t go well start to seem trivial. 3. Less Blame, More Guidance When we get hurt, it is instinctive to want to make the other person “pay,” but if we can guide the person to fix the situation, things are more likely to get better sooner. 4. Less Judgment, More Wonder We are all unique, different, and a wee bit crazy in our own way. The best way to counter the urge to  be judgmental  is to cultivate a sense of wonder at each person’s uniqueness. 5. Less Resistance, More Acceptance The more we resist something, the more it persists. The more we accept it, the less it bothers us. 6. Less Shame, More Vulnerability Shame is a deep-seated fear that we are not enough. Yet, it’s

I had an interesting moment this week.   It involved a former lover from days long gone in this old brain.   We met in high school in Germany and somehow reconnected locally.   She lived outside of San Francisco so off I went to visit her.   Being a succulent I wanted more than just a visit.   I wanted her.   It was always “her.”   I spent the night, acted submissively coy the next morning and we got it on.   As in HELLO HOW ARE YOU?   I’M DOING GREAT, THANK YOU.   AND YOU?   ARE YOU DOING GREAT NOW TOO?   Now bound by the act of romantic swepticism* I planned on seeing her frequently.   And I did.   I was removed from my marriage barely 5 months and here I am, engaged in a serious, committed, I’m yours relationship.   Like writing for publication I threw everything I had in her direction.   I said all the right things, I did all the right things.   I talked, I listened, I kissed, I laughed, I held her hand and I just did it.   Like you’re supposed to, right?   Don’t you want to keep